Darfur and Sault St. Marie

Study time is upon me for the first time in about two years since I left University. I've got my Doritoes, my anti-acids, and my two liter bottle of Pepsi to get me through the night.

And by the way, congrats Luke on quitting the cola! While your stomach lining may be weak you have a will of iron.

I do have good roommates though to go thruogh school with, they're pretty quiet at night, Jay is playing a baseball game and Z_______ my roommate from Iraqi is leaving heaping plates of sunflower shells everywhere like spent shell casings.

In other news Condilliza rice is calling for an immediate ceasefire in the Darfur region of Somalia.

In other news I am calling for an immediate end to gridlock coming into Ottawa from Orleans.

Becouse I dont live in Ottawa anymore I can pretend that wishing for something is going to make it happen.

Mary and Mike

Waitng for the bus today I met up with someone I knew from from my hometown of Blind RIver.

Here Name is MB McGinn and she asks me where I work

and I says 'Stela' and she says she knows somebody there named Mary.

So I tell Mary that someone from my hometown knows her and she says she knows someone from my hometown named M McGiin (the girls brother)

So I says, yeah, I know Mike, he's really outgoing and fucks as many woman as he can to prove he's not a total fag.

Actually i didn't say that about Mike becouse Mike is pretty awsome and I would never use the word fag becosue it's demeaining to homosexeuls.

My belief in micheals goodness has it's origin in the story of how Mike let me live with him for free for a few weeks while I was looking for an apartment.

Also my belief in his altruism is drawn from Mike volunteering to coach one of the girls highschool volleyball teams back in highschool.

Pure Altriusm

nomater what anyone else might say about him. Back to the part where he offers me shelter.

Becouse I was a total asshole to him back in highschool he totally didn't owe it to me to offer me a place to live. Since that time I"ve always been blown away by his forgiveness and generosity regarding that offer.

And he's totally not gay.

I just joke round about him being gay becouse him being gay would explain why he talks and dresses the way he does.

Cheers Mike! Your a Helluva guy

Online Survey

Today I filled out an online servey on behalf of Yahoo! while reading articls on the situation in lebanon.

I agreed to a survey becouse I thuoght the survey was going to be about world events since I was browsing thruoght the "Yahoo International News" when Yahoo asked me if I wanted to do a quick online survey.

The first question was "Have you answered any questionaires about hotdogs in the last six months?"

I said "Yes", and then told them that I'm a rich Malaysian who buys all his food over the internet. Specifically I buy and eat 15 brands of hotdogs.

I volunteered for more surveys in the future.

The surveyors asked for my email so they could send me more surveys and I sgreed to send them an address.

I went thruogh my hotmail contact folder giving them the addresses of all the people who had in the past betrayed me or declined my offers of cheap sexual thrills.

In the end I sent them the address of J______ for trashing me to C_________ and then i sent the surveyors C______'s address for not having sex with me in the months before her wedding.

All in all a job well done.

Forward

The last few days there has been this push at work to clean under the server counter.

They say, Rob, make sure there isn't any debris under there.

And as soon as they say debris I get all freaky and shit because the word debris sets off something.

Mostly me thinking about the Israeli invasion of Lebanon. It's been on the news and all over the web so it's hard to ignore

The worlds only superpower is siding with Israel and the Canadian government is following suit.

Stephen Harpers impromptu evacuation was a good gesture I admit, though I wonder if the dead will be placed in the luggage area or in the fridge with the Ontario wine and caviar.

So that was on my mind the last half hour of work.

When I got home I had a forward in my hotmail account for a rally at parliament hill on Saturday July 22nd in support of the people of Lebanon.

I'm scheduled to work Saturday but this is more important.

More information here

And Seeing as I went to work today in spite of having a painfully raw penis, I think I owe to to myself and my distant relatives the favor of asking for Saturday off.

Reading my last entry

I started yesterdays entry with the line, "Work was Hectic today" And fuck is that ever the shittiest way to start any story ever.

When someone starts a story with "work was hectic today", I start thinking about the next time I'm going to get to jerk off or the next issue of "Hellblazer"

because I sure as hell don't want to hear about someone's hectic day unless it involves an rushed impromptu blowjob in a washroom that failed to end in ejaculation as the employees afternoon coffee break is only a modest 15 minutes in lengh and thats not nearly long enuogh to reach climax.

And the person getting the blowjob is kinda fat so he can't actually see the action over his own belly and he really likes to watch.

However Fat Boy can't see her mouth on his cock and there are no mirrors in the stall. And since the fat man is without the visual stimulation he's not turned on enough to finish and so he doesn't.

That's the kind of day I like to hear about. Not becouse I like to hear bad news but I think human strungle over adversity is a more interesting.

Even if it involves fat guys not being able to finish.

Busy night at the Stella

Work was hectic today, had allot of dishes to wash, luckily Chris jumped in to help me out.

At one point I sliced my thumb open which is trouble

I was cut when sorting through the silverware.

When you sort silveware you dump the tray of about 100 pieces of silverware into tray and put each type of cutlery with like pieces till you have piles of knives spoons and forks.

The first thing you do is remove the steak knives so that you don't get cut while sorting through the rest of it.

I had removed 20 steak knives, though I was cut when there were only two knives left.

Haiku

Cut by one steak knife
While reaching for another
Loyal twins in July

Later that night T-bone made a steak for me.

On the last bus Home a guy tried to get on the bus who had left his pass at home. The driver said tough luck but I lent the night passenger 2.75, the change from yesterdays shawarma.

The bus driver said that a quarter short won't a big deal and let him on.

And I got off and Hurdman station at the end of another good night.

First Entry in this my New Blog

I'm a dishwasher now at this new italian place in the market.

When I showed up to drop off my resume the head chef aksed me if I have washed dishes

I told him that "no I hadn't"

I' however managed to save the interview by telling the chef that I had a minor in religoen.

The chef was much impressed and tells me that "washing dishes isn't fucking rocket science."

He then tells me that his dishwasher didn't show up tonight and he needed me immediately. I came dressed for an interview

but I was like whatever, I'll washes dishes in my expensive 50 doller pants that my grandmother buoght me in America.

So 10 miniuts later I was washing dishes in my expensive American pants and shiney shoes and it turns out I fucking rock at washing pots and pans, dishes and even silverware.

I always knew there was something out there I was good at. It was just a matter of taking a risk and putting myself out there and finding out what that something was.

So now I got a job and a paycheck and awsome and co-workers.

Who says there aern't good jobs waiting for university grads?

Roberto Shah Hamaz